Deadpool and Venom's Big Adventure
by Rahkshilord
Summary: The Venom Symbiote has grown sick of lackluster hosts, it wants Brock back. in the wake of this reunion Deadpool is hired by the kingpin to take out Venom, But soon things take a wrong turn and two unlikely heroes must save the day. Ha, Yeah right.
1. Prologue

_Hate_...

It hates him, it's host body, it hates him so much. hates him like it hated the last host, and the host before that. They hate it too, they just don't know that until it's too late.  
>Why? why was it saddled with these ungrateful hosts? It gave them power, heals them, protects<em> them<em>, and yet they still hate it, treat it like dirt, like nothing.  
>An object, that is what it is to them, something to be used when needed and discarded afterwards.<p>

Condemned...

It showed him kindness, granted him so much, and was hated for it, he only ever tried to help yet was thrown away. Like the trash they all think it is, so oblivious to it's pain.  
>Does it existence requiring hosts make it a monster? No, it doesn't believe so, it's only crime was being born, and it was condemned for it so long ago.<p>

_Pain_...

The pain, the pain drove it mad, he ripped it from his flesh and ran away, utter rejection of the symbioses it offered him out of it's kindness. It loved him, loved him for rescuing it, loved him for accepting it... only he didn't accept it, he didn't even know what it was.  
>It thought he knew, thought it was his choice to join with it, that was it's biggest mistake.<p>

_Rage_...

The Rage made it this way, it was blank, but the rage it felt from being rejected intermixed with the rage of it's next host, rage at the same man, changed him.  
>Revenge, they both wanted revenge, and the host was unable to get it alone, so it came to him, helped him.<br>He accepted it gladly, took it and merged his thoughts with it's, they were one yet two, and in the end he threw it away like all the others.

_Rejection_...

That hurt the most, it's longtime host left it, _sold_ it, it was never the same, it was empty, used like a weapon by those who didn't understand. Why did he leave, they were so alike. when they were together, they were a new being, not man or Symbiote, but a new, whole creature.  
>They were Venom, they were whole.<p>

It is empty now, it needs him thought it was rejected, surely he was wrong, he will see that.  
>Or be made to see it.<p> 


	2. Chapter 1

So I got bored one day and started writing this, Hope anyone reading enjoys it.

And yes I do own Deadpool and Venom, i am both Todd McFarland and Rob Liefeld #blatantlies

* * *

><p>Venom, or what passes for venom these days leapt from roof to roof with their superhuman power, cracking down hard on the concrete rooftops of New York's skyline.<br>This venom was small, as small as they had been before they were venom at all.

_Escape_...

The only thought in the subjugated Symbiote's mind, was of escape, escaping this host, of those that tried to control it. They think it powerless, think that control of the host's life will let them use it, how wrong they are, It can live without a host for many hours, and there are so many hosts in this city.

Venom lands again, hardly taking any time at all to rocket back into the air, the host almost cries out in excitement as he does so. he begins to fall back to earth, the setting sun outlining his form.

_Time_...

And then it was gone, left him mid jump like he did two hosts ago, and let the worthless meat hit the ground hard.  
>He struggles to move, even if he hadn't fallen four stories he wouldn't be able to walk, for he has no real legs. It had given him his legs back, and now it took them away.<p>

"Wh... why?" he coughs, the last word he'll ever speak, it almost feels bad for what it did, almost.

It moves though the shadows of the back alleys like it wasn't even there, using it powers to blend in almost perfectly to the cracks in the ground, nobody would know it was there unless it wanted them to.  
>A deadly shadow looking for it's next host, a temporary one of course, it has it's sights set on another, one it knows all too well.<p>

_Love_...

It loved him, he loved it, it only makes sense for them to be together once again.  
>Then the world will see, they will see the true Venom long forgotten.<br>It's only a matter of time, and it is patient, they will be reborn, it is only a matter of time...

Eddie Brook fumbled with his keys and the bad of groceries, back when he was venom he could have used the suit to gain a third arm- no! he had to stop thinking like that, Venom is dead, he's moved on.  
>Ever after he became Anti-Venom, after his cancer was cured, he still thought about when he was Venom, no, when <em>they<em>were venom.

But those days were done, his life was back to normal, well at least as normal as anyone who used to be a mass murdering Supervillan can be.  
>Yes, for once is a long time, Eddie Brock felt normal again.<br>He finally made it into his modest home and set the bag down on the counter to his left.

His apartment wasn't much to look at, trash everywhere, cracks in the roof, and tacky wallpaper that was badly peeling off with each passing day. But as venom he had ofter slept in sewers and ditches, this was by far a step up from those times he thought.

After putting his things away in the small cramped kitchen, He sat down on a ratty brown soft he had found in the dump, and flicked on the old TV of his that was hardly working, one of the sides was duct taped up to hold in the wiring and the screen had a large dead spot in the right top corner.

"People hare advised to stay in their homes until such time as the creature can be apprehended"

The news is going on about some escaped monster, an all too common thing in his opinion. Brock's mind drifted back to a time when he was the monster on the news, only getting snapped out by one word said by the female newscaster.

"Venom"

He froze, was that what she said or his twisted mind playing tricks on him again, he locked his thoughts onto the TV, his heart racing. She went on about the report of the black form known as Venom being spotted, and he closed his eyes and tried to forget.

"Too late..." he said to himself, he left his apartment with a swiftness he didn't know he had in him anymore and rushed down and out of the dirty gray walls of the hallway.

He was stop at the door by a young brunette who lived next to him, Sarah.

She was the closest thing he had to a friend these days, what with her knowing he used to be Venom and not caring. "Everyone deserves a second chance" she told him when she found out.

"Not now girl" he said harshly, pushing past her.

"Venom?" she asked, though her tone indicated to him that she already suspected the answer.

Brock continued down the sidewalk, barely slowing down to say "Saw the news too huh?"  
>"Heard it on the radio on my way home" she replied. "Whatever it is you're going to do, don't."<br>Her tone now was of a friend trying to stop someone they cared about from doing something stupid, like drive drunk or start smoking again. She moved to grab him arm and pull him back but he smacked her hand away.  
>"Don't act like you understand!' he said. "This is my responsibility, I can find it, nobody knows it like I do."<p>

They just stood there for a moment, Eddie never looking back, he didn't want to see the face she was making, knowing what it was going to be.  
>"I just..." she started to say something but pulled the words back, like they would seal his fate if he heard them.<br>"I'll be fine." he told her, not believing it himself.

Before she knew it he was running down the street with no hope of her catching up, he may be human now, be he's still superhuman to most, he could lift a car if he wanted, she was sure of it just be looking at him.  
>He ran as fast as he could with no direction, no that isn't right, he has a path and a goal, he doesn't know why but before he knew it he was there, where they first become Venom.<p>

The church is the same as it always was, and empty at this time as usual, sans one figure kneeling at the foot of the alter.  
>It shifted a little as he entered, letting Brock know it was aware of his presence.<br>"We knew you'd come heere to find ussss" it hissed, staying completely still "thisss Hosst iss weak, we need sstrong hosstss."

Eddie Brock, Former host to Venom, didn't know how to feel about seeing his old "friend" again, he wanted to kill it, embrace it, and run away at the same time.

"Venom.." He managed to say after a long time.  
>"Noo!" it hissed, "We are not Venom, without you Venom isss nothing"<p>

The still form of Venom moved, but not in any way it should, the body under the black suit slumped out, having either died or passed out from the strain of being host to another being.  
>With no mouth the Symbiote could no longer speak, choosing to stay exactly where it was before, it's dark folds inviting Eddie to join him.<br>It's been so long, can he handle having another voice in his head again? and the pain of being separated from the Creature, using it was like a drug to him.

No, he wouldn't become separated again, if he did this now he wouldn't stop halfway, the Symboite always wanted to fully join with him but something held him back.  
>But now, he couldn't let it fall out of his control again, but still he could not progress, his feet staid locked on the spot for who knows how long, time didn't seem to mater anymore.<br>He stepped forward into the darkness of it, felt it cling to his body, enter his mind.

_Joy..._

the simple thoughts of the Symbiote fill his ears, his eyes, his mind. power courses though his veins, and he smiled, truly smiled for the first time in years.  
>Venom lived again.<p> 


	3. Chapter 2

_Hate... Love..._

They didn't know how he found him so quickly, be there he was, in he classic red and blue web pattered suit.

"Ssspider-Man" they said. Of course it was Spider-Man, who else would show up in the dead of night to come after them. "Long time no sssee old friend."

something about the way they said old friend tipped him off, because every muscle in Spider-Man's, or should we say Peter Parker's body tensed up.

They knew each others real names, it was a special bond they shared with their enemy.

"Well if it isn't little Eddie Brock Junior, thought you were out of the Venom game for good?" His voice, always so cocky, something Venom knew to be a falsehood to hide his true feelings. It always annoyed them, grating into their shared nerves.

"We were." they finally reply, trying to stall for a time to get away, they had no desire to fight him anymore, that part of them was long dead.

Eddie stepped forward, the suit changing into the form of his discarded street clothes. he held out his arms in a non threatening manner and calmly stated "I'm in control Pete, I know how to manage it, you know I can do this, that I'm the only one who can do this."  
>" Come on Eddie, we've been down this road before, what makes you think things have changed?"<p>

_Sorrow..._

"Because I've bonded with it Pete, _fully" h_e flatly states. "it can't hide it's thoughts from me even if it wanted too, it feels bad Pete, for what it's done."

Spider-man sighs and rubs his forehead though his mask. "Eddie, maybe it's lying, and don't tell me it can't lie because we both know it can."

_Rage..._

The black and white suit reformed over his skin, his face distorting into the twisted smile of Venom. "We do not ansswer to you ssspider-man!" they bellow.  
>Spider-Man's cries of "Eddie wait!" fall on deaf ears as Venom jumps out of the church though the roof and disappears into the night.<p>

The cold New york night whisks past Them as they swing along, God how he'd missed this, the freedom of webswinging, the power of the Suit, no, of him.  
>He lands on the roof of his building around 2 AM, feeling as though he was fully merged with the Suit, the voice was gone, in a sense.<br>it was still there, but it isn't alien, isn't it's own voice, it's voice is his voice.

"We're like Carnage now, I'm like Carnage."

Their, _his _son, Carnage, never had two voices, was always like this, but is this better?"  
>He almost falls down the stairs as a wave of nausea comes over him, starts to drawn him.<br>But somehow he makes it to his door and hurries inside just as his body had enough and fell over completely unable to move, his door still half open.

He had forgotten the drain that being venom had on him at first, it had been years before he really fit in the suit like a second skin. this was a mistake he wouldn't repeat ever again, no, he was going to be stronger then ever tomorrow, he just knew it.

* * * * *

He had to run into her again didn't he? if only he had gone up to the roof and left that way, but he couldn't risk Spider-Man or the avengers finding him, not while he was still bonding to it again.  
>She had a sadness in her eyes, she knew. somehow she always saw right though him.<br>"Just don't." he said, stopping her before she even started. "it was the only way."  
>Tears roll down her eyes as she ponds her fists into his back while he walks away.<br>"Liar!" she screamed, now completely sobbing. "You wanted this! your nothing be a relapsing addict!"  
>"Maybe I am." he replied, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "But you don't know what it's <em>like,<em> this feeling..._"_

It all happened in an instant, she went to hit him and his reflexes lashed out with Venom's powers. She crashed backwards into the bricks that made up the front wall of the apartment building, a cloud of pulverised red brick blocked out her face.

_Horror..._

He ran, he had to get away, they had to get away. They weren't merged, he didn't know what made him think that they ever would be. It was hiding it's thoughts from him, it lied to him!  
>In an alley nearby he started to grasp at the suit, heart pounding loud in his ears.<br>He ripped it and it screamed inside his mind, sending it's pain into him.

Eddie Brock collapsed, sweat pouring from his body, his heavy uneven breathing blocking out any sound around him.  
>He messed up again didn't he? Relapsed like a druggie, just like she said. What a moron he was, giving birth to Venom once again, how long until he was overwhelmed by it's thoughts?<p>

_Danger... _

His eyes shot open at it's words, something akin to Spider-man's sixth sense was given to him by the suit, always had been. He jumped to his feet just as a group of pissed off punks surrounded him, he looked down at his body to see the suit was still in the form of normal clothes, they didn't know who he was.  
>"Get... back..." he coughed, still weak from trying to remove the suit. They laughed at him, thinking him a sick old man who they could rob easily.<br>"Give us yer' wallet gramps." cackled the leader of this gang as he fiddled with the bat in his hands.

_Save..._  
>The suit stirred, it wouldn't let him get hurt, never hurt again, it loved<br>him, it must protect him!

_Kill... _

It exploded out of his and coated his skin in shadows, the rib-like spider forming on his chest and back. His muscles burst, his bones cracked; something nobody knew about venom was the changes his body went though each time he Eddie became it, it hurt bad.  
>His; their mouth, widened, their teeth became sharp, their tongue long.<p>

_Kill..._

They struck out, the gang banger had no chance against them as his head was torn from his body. Eddie screamed inside his own head, begged it to stop, but it didn't heed his words.  
>They grabbed the next kid, because they were all around the same age, just teenagers who fell in with the wrong crowd. They ripped off his arms.<p>

The cracking of the third boy's bones was like music to their ears, a symphony of violence played by an orchestra of death. The last two ran into the street screaming nonsense, unable to put to words what was happening.  
>They sen tout a tentacle and dragged the slower of the two back in.<p>

_Crush..._

They grabbed his, squeezed him, smashed him into paste. They laughed, the inhuman laugh of a true monster.  
>"Hahahaha!" they cackled. "it's good to be back!"<br>with that they leapt out of the alley and began to swing on their webs, something they picked up when they first came to this world, it surly beat jumping everywhere.  
>And so he swung and swung, and vanished into the skyline.<p> 


	4. Chapter 3

Eight AM the next morning, on the other side of the city, a red and black costumed man argued with a short stocky man in a suit, they were sitting at a cafe, the short man knew not to talk to him anywhere they were alone, not again.  
>"Look, even if this IS a Fanfiction I can't even come close to <em>killing <em>venom!"  
>The short man look at him puzzled. "Fanfiction?" he asked.<br>The masked man waved his hand as if to say "forget it" and pushed up the bottom of his mask, revealing quite a few scars on his face which you could almost swear moved if you stared at them long enough.  
>He took a sip of his drink and promptly spit it out, too bad for his "friend" across the table, for he sit it on him.<p>

"Who wrote this coffee?" he asked, before saying "Yeah I guess that makes sense" as if he was answered, which anyone there would tell you he was not.  
>This man was Deadpool, also known as the Merc with a mouth.<br>"Alright, I'll do it, but you gotta throw in something extra into my normal fee, yeah maybe that... No! I've got it, yes, that will do fine."  
>"What do you want?" the man asks, afraid of what he'll say."<br>Deadpool threw his arms out and exclaimed "A lifetime supply of socks! I'm always running out of clean socks when I need to be somewhere, and if I ever run out of my _lifetime_ supply, _I'll come for you" _He says the last part in a way you could almost think he was joking, if you didn't know who he was, they say he once ran a nun over because she made him drop his cupcake by accident.  
>The man gulped hard, his words getting stuck in his throat. "Y-yes yes, whatever you want Mr Wilson."<p>

Deadpool Got up and started to walk away, "Alrighty, one dead shape shifting super strong alien symbiote coming up! Do you want me to kill the guy under it too? because that'll cost you double."

"No No, just the suit is fine."

"God I hope I don't end up teaming up with him, I've had enough of those fics..."

Now that that was settled, only one thing remained, how was a Merc with a quick healing factor gonna fight a super strong, super fast alien that only has weakness to high pitched sound waves?  
>If only Weapon X had given him a super screaming power too, maybe laser eyes.<br>And blades in his arms! wait no, that's stupid.  
>"Oh duh!" he exclaimed, slapping himself on the forehead. He pulled out his U-Phone and went to the web browser.<br>After a quick search he was on a site called .net, on a fic called Deadpool and Venom's big adventure, chapter 3.

"Wow, what a great idea future self, I'll try that! but where do I get an Iron man suit?"  
>One time-skip later and he was outside of Tony Stark's house, man those scene jumps were disorienting. He shook off dizzyness and crashed though the large front window of one of the richest superheroes who ever lived.<p>

A robotic chime of "Unauthorised entry" as two mini-guns slid out of the walls and opened fire.  
>Deadpool laughed as he ran though them with no head for his own life, god super-healing is a great power he thought.<br>"Stop making my think things you sick bastard!" he yelled at no-one at all.  
>He scowled under his mask and responded to nothing with "That's a lie! I was talking to <em>you<em>!"

But by then he was past the turrets and in the basement, you'd think Iron Man would have better security in his house, and before long he was faying away in one of Tony's old iron man suits, not as advanced as his new ones but it would do for this.  
>He quickly stopped at a home depot and got some paint, this red and gold was too tacky for him.<br>"Well I'm no artiest but that should do for now" he said as he finished spray painting his new armored suit to his liking.

He spent the next few hours figuring out how to use the suit above fly in a straight line, thinking himself now a master of Ironman suits he set off to find his target, just like he had read.

"You know, for a fanfic this isn't too awful, at least there's no super overpowered OCs, yet."

He lucked out and found Venom swinging along soon after he figured out the suits bio signal tracking, maybe he should have looked at the manual after all, would have saved him some time.  
>It was just turning dark when he decided to confront Venom.<p>

"Time for a battle scene right? I do love battle scenes."

Sorry, chapter is a bit short, but Deadpool in finally in the story right? That's gotta count for something.


	5. Chapter 4

"Oh Venom, be-hind y-ou~!" he sang, getting the alien to stop on a nearby rooftop and turn around.  
>"What are you meant to be?" it hissed.<br>Deadpool folded his armored arms and cackled.  
>"Why I'm Dead Man! wait, that isn't right..."<br>After fumbling though his thoughts for a full five minutes he spoke up again.

"Ironpool! I'm the hopefully invincible Ironpool! I didn't read far enough to see if this worked, damn I should have."

"Ironpool's" armor was still wet with shoddily applied paint, replacing the colors of the suit with his own red and black pattern, and adding his black ovals around the eye pieces.  
>Venom laughed, green drool dripping off it's long tongue.<br>"We will rip you apart, won't we Eddie? Yesss yesss we will..."

The alien and human combo burst into motion, taking wide swings at Ironpool, who didn't dodge very well and went flying into a brick wall and out the other side.  
>Ironpool got back out and flew full blast at Venom, knocking them both off the roof and down into the alley below.<br>Before Venom could get up Ironpool fired his hand laser thing he'd seen Iron man do, so he knew it could happen.  
>"Hadokan!" Ironpool shouted as it hit. "Always wanted to say that in a fight."<p>

_Pain..._

The blast had hit them in the shoulder, burned them, it hurt them.  
>Eddie Brock's bare shoulder showed under the suit where the alien had been burned away., but soon it would knit itself back together and they would be whole once more.<br>They had to survive this fight, He needs more time to take control of the suit like he used to be able too.  
>The suit isn't used to being controlled anymore, not after what's happened to it, Eddie will show the world he can control Venom, that he <em>is<em> venom.  
>This moron is in his way.<p>

_Smash._..

They leap forward, kicking the wannabe Iron Man in the head, sending him spinning to the dirty ground.  
>He got up, a fast food bag stuck to the side of his face; if he knew he didn't show it.<br>Ironpool sent more blasts at venom, most missing but a few hit their mark. Venom fell to it's knees, weak, so weak.  
>"Just like button mashing in street fighter, easy as pie, which actually isn't that easy if you've ever tried to make it."<br>"Please... help ussss..." They pleaded. "Sssso hard, two voicessss... Pain..."

Ironpool de-powered his blasters and pulled Venom to their feet.  
>"What the hell, I know what that's like, don't I?" he asks the air again.<br>"You will help usss?" They ask, confused.  
>Ironpool shrugs. "I think we're meant to team up in this fic anyways, and I'll do anything to get back to my comic quickly."<br>Deadpool's famous insane ramblings, Eddie knew about those but didn't expect them to be so, unsettling.

"Did you actually think it would be that easy to steal my suit?" came a voice from behind Deadpool.  
>"Oh... shit." he said as he turned around to face... the real Iron man, his latest suit looking far more advanced then the one Deadpool had taken.<br>"Oh hey tony, Did you not want people borrowing these? My bad"

"Alright Deadpool, just shut up and give it back and I'll let you go this time, I'm late for a date here."

"Me, shut up? you don't know who I am do you? I'm the Merc with a mouth!"

He fired off a blast with another cry of "Hadokan!" and sent the off guard Iron man to the ground, where the weak but still able venom filled his armor's flight boosters with webbing, which Deadpool knew wouldn't show him down that much, maybe a few minutes at most.

Things were not going according to plan, or were they? damn he should have read more ahead then he did. But now instead of fighting and killing Venom, he was running from Iron man with him in a stolen robot suit.

He's had weirder days, like when Loki made him look like Tom Cruise, or the Meat-suit; but this one was still up there in weird.  
>Iron man was on them now, Deadpool's helmet told him that much.<br>Oh man, He's never been chased my iron man before, this was actually kind of fun, in a twisted sort of way.  
>"Thisss way!" called out venom, sharply pulling a left turn and dropping down to street<br>level.

Deadpool followed Venom as he entered a manhole that led to new york's sewers.  
>It had to be sewers didn't it.<br>"You might want to get rid of the sssuit, he can track it."  
>"But I like being Ironpool!"<br>"If you can disssable it'sss tracker, then keep it, doessn't matter to usss."

Deadpool groaned and opened a web browser on the suit's computer, Hating to resort to this same trick twice.  
>"Huh, so Tony's a firefox fan." he remarked as he went back to the fanfiction site.<br>Scrolling past the part that just happened he ended up at what he needed.  
>Following what it said he smashed his head into the bricks of the sewers, the suit shut down shortly and rebooted into "Safe Mode."<br>"No networking, no tracking!" he stated, made sense to him anyway. "But now I can't read my emails, damn it."

They walked side by side though the oddly large sewer system until they came to an very out of place door. Venom called it an "old hideout" but he didn't say who's, venom didn't hide in sewers like the lizard, did he?  
>"Ssso..." they both said at once; Venom responding first.<br>"Why have you been sssent for uss?"  
>"Kingpin wanted you dead, I don't know why, money is money."<br>"What does Wilson Fisk want with usss?"  
>"I just told you dude, or dudes I guess, I don't know, it ain't my job."<p>

Venom sensed no hostility towards him or Eddie, and finally released his host from his control, shifting into Eddie's street clothes once more.  
>"All right Venom," Deadpool said as he took off the "Borrowed" Iron man helmet and put it down on a ratty old table. "This is the part where we make a short term pact to work together and find out why you have a price on your head right?"<br>"Don't call me Venom when I'm like this, I'm Brock." He replied, slight anger at Deadpool's words.

The room they were in wasn't that bad really, about as bad as Eddies real apartment, kind of sad for his apartment to be compared to a sewer hideout. Eddie slumped down onto the grey sofa in the middle of the room and closed his eyes for a moment.


	6. Chapter 5

He rubbed his eyes and slowly sat up, clock on the wall said it was about 5 in the morning, the next day. He hadn't slept in two days, the suit didn't let him.  
>Deadpool was fully out of his stolen armor and snoring quite loudly over on the frameless mattress also in the room.<br>Eddie though it was odd how he slept in his mask but no other part of his outfit.  
>"I'm... Ironpool..." Deadpool mumbled in his sleep. "That's right ladies... that Ironpool..."<p>

Eddie almost laughed at this, His life had gone from being back to normal to totally screwed up in a matter of 4 days, he's such an idiot for letting the symbiote re-merge with him.  
>He's getting too old for this shit, this is a young man's game.<p>

He snuck away from Deadpool and back to the surface, even this early new york was buzzing with people, it wasn't hard for him to slip into the crowds and vanish, the suit's powers helped too.  
>Wilson Fisk, the kingpin of crime. why does he want you dead Eddie? Think.<br>No clue, maybe it's just one of those random things, who knows.  
>Or maybe it has something to do with that other symbiote over there.<p>

_Hate..._

"Carnage."  
>The red and black alien stood atop a white van and was staring at him. at least it looked like he was, hard to tell with those symbiote eyes that never seem to aim at anything.<br>before he could think he was enveloped in his suit, it's power flowing though his body.  
>"I had heard the real venom was back in action, good ta see ya dad."<p>

Carnage called them dad, always had, they hated it. Carnage was their offspring yes, but he was insane, thinking he had only one voice.  
>That was wrong, they just thought they were one, part of their madness.<br>"Sson..." They hissed, stepping forward to face the much smaller symbiote.  
>Venom had always been massive, but size doesn't mean power here, Carnage is far stronger then they ever were or could be.<p>

Only a high speed camera could have told you who made the first move, because in the blink of an eye they were fighting. Venom punching and kicking at Carnage who turned his arms into blades and tried to hack at his father.  
>Venom tackled Carnage into a red sports car, shattering the windows into a million pieces.<br>Quite a bit of the glass ended up in Carnage's back; re responded with a hammer shaped fist to the face.

When they stood Up venom didn't know where they were, the last blow knocking the senses out of him. Carnage wrapped his arms around venom's body and squeezed them tighter and tighter with every second.  
>His bones cracked, white hot pain searing into his brain, blocking out his thoughts.<p>

_Pain..._

He struggled against the strength of carnage's arms to no avail, he was just too powerful for them, no hope of escape; Then Deadpool showed up.

"Hey there buddy, thought you'd need help; my merc senses were tingling."  
>One insane Merc with an Iron man suit crashed headfirst into Carnage, sending them both tumbling into the parked cars on the street.<p>

"Yeah! that's how we do it Co-Op style!" he yelled, sending a barrage of laser blasts into the sprawled form of carnage.

"Venom and Deadpool! Partners in crime! If we got cable involved we'd be a best seller for sure! Just don't let Liefeld draw it."

He picked up the collapsed Eddie Brock/Venom and shook him until he was awake.  
>sometime between Deadpool showing up and then he had passed out.<br>"Eddie, you alright Buddy? it's too early for the crossover to end!"  
>"Ssstop ssshaking Uss!"<br>"Oh, sorry dude, got carried away again didn't I? So is Carnage connected to anything or just filler?"

"We do not know."

Deadpool hoped the story was going to start soon, he wanted to get this over with as quick as he could, he's a busy man you know.  
>There was only one thing they knew, and that left one thing to do as well.<p>

"Well Venom old pal, Time to go talk to the Kingpin!"

Scene skip, Venom doesn't seem effected. he doesn't even know it happened; Deadpool does.  
>It hurts every time, but he's used to it by now. Sometimes of he's focused on a task he won't even notice until after it happened.<br>They're at Wilson Fisk's office now, right at the door.  
>"Well Venom buddy, this is it!" Deadpool shouted as he bashed his way though the door and came face to face with... Carnage?<br>"Wait, I thought this was the scene where we learn what's going on from the Kingpin? We already fought carnage."  
>"Yeah you already fought me you insane freak, you just forgot to end it."<p>

"You're calling who insane Mr mass murderer for fun? I only kill people for money, Totally different."

They Three arguably four people in the room, all with varying levels of insanity, were locked in a staring contest, because nobody could see each others eyes though all the masks.  
>Carnage's left arm reshaped into a blade, and he slashed as hand as he could at Deadpool, Who thought his suit was invincible; he was wrong.<br>Carnage severed Deadpool and his Ironpool suit in half at the waist. before you knew it Deadpool was back up, having managed to reattach his legs and his healing did the rest, though he had discarded the mech suit that was utterly broken now.  
>His suit hung loosely off his hips, revealing his white with red hearts boxer shorts.<p>

"Aw man, I still had payments on that thing."  
>He makes light of this, he always does; everything is a game when you're that crazy. Though Deadpool thinks himself the only one who's sane.<br>"Be more careful Carnie, Fanfics don't always give the Main Charaters Plot Immunity!"

"SHUT UP AND DIE!"

With that scream Carnage dove forwards with his blades out, only to be stopped by a hulking dark figure. Venom slapped Carnage away with the back of his hand.  
>They charged each other again.<p>

_Kill... KILL... KILLL!_

Venom's rage reached it's boiling point, something snapped inside him; and with it so did carnage's right arm. Venom took it in one hand and broke it like a child might break a twig.  
>He was stronger now, faster now, He could beat Carnage once and for all.<p>

"I, WILL, END YOU!" they screamed, both Eddie and the alien at once, at that time they were truly one, one mind, one body, one goal.

To kill Carnage.

He was Venom, he was strong; Carnage's right arm shattered.  
>He was ruthless, he was Venom; Carnage's arms were gone, ripped off at the shoulder.<br>He was The Judge, he was the executioner; He ripped out carnage's spine.

They were too merged, Carnage only had one host, could only have that one host.  
>No host, no carnage. Gone forever by his hand.<br>His fault Carnage ever existed, that wrong finally set right at last.  
>So why did he feel like a monster?<p>

Time passed slowly, the volume of the clock on the wall seeming to get louder with each tick.  
>Tick tick tick tick..<br>Losing himself, he was losing himself. No, he had lost himself.  
>Did it ever have it at all? Can you lose something you did not have?<br>Who is he besides Eddie Brock, who died the night they become Venom?  
>Are they Venom? Maybe they were once, but are they now? Having been through so much, both of them.<br>This new merger was not Venom, but at the same time it was Venom.  
>Eddie + Suit = Venom; but it doesn't add up right.<br>More pressing was why the %*($ Carnage was here, This turn of events made no sense.

"Oh man, _ooooh man._ This is some really bad writing, I mean come on, Carnage?" Deadpool's newly reconnected upper half complained as he pulled himself up onto his feet.

"Besides I mean really, Venom took him down without a fight? That doesn't even make sense, venom isn't some godlike being who can't lose, is he?"  
>"Ssshut up you fool! there'sss sssomething wrong here, nothing iss right."<p>

Eddie Brock stared in horror as the world around him started to dissolve into nothing, every object becoming a massive torrent of colors twisting around his vision.  
>"What new madness is this?" he exclaimed, fully in his normal voice, his suit was gone, pulled up into the nexus of color like everything else.<br>And then he was somewhere else; well to be more accurate, he was now aware of where he had been all along, strapped to a chair with some high tech headgear on him, in a badly lit room.  
>But why couldn't deadpool have just been a part of the illusion? Because waking up to that madman wasn't anywhere on eddies list of things he wanted to see right now, even more so seeing as deadpool was in nothing but his mask and a creepy set of adult sized x-men underwear, cyclops' face smack in the center of his crotch.<br>"Oh for **%& sake, this is by far the worst day of my life." he groaned shifted his view away. "Hey Deadpool, you still suck in whatever the *&$^& that was?"  
>Deadpool responded with "Ooh, pretty colors... so spinny..."<br>Guess that would be a no.


	7. Chapter 6

Yea verily, did the two unlikely knights of justice awake from thine wicked technomancer's enchantment, the Pool of Death did doth exclaim

"Hark! mine pantaloons hath been misplaced!"

to which his companion Eddith R Brock the second of Brooklyn did place his forehead into the calming embrace of his mighty palms.

A call did echo through the halls of metal, reaching their noble ears like a bird on the wind. "Great and powerful masters of thy own minds, forget thine petty quibbles and venture forth down yonder halls, there is much to discuss!"

Deadpoolicus Maximus did execute the shrug of the shoulders, the mightiest of "mine knowledge is insufficient gestures", and did proceed to stride down to answer the mysterious beckoning, unbeknownst of the danger that doth lay before them.

"Well I could just fornicate my self" proclaimed Brock, his divinely sculpted demigod of a body unfortunately feeling quite naked without it's extraterrestrial partner in crimes most foul. "Had nry but a single thing been the truth from that yonder mindwarp I should have wished it to be mine suit of alien origin, forsooth I should wish thee to be the figment of mine imagination Puddle of Decay, so might i once again be involved in the silky blackness of that which is known as Venom"

"Ey' don' be gett'n ya'self down me friend o' mine! least ya still got ta keep your pants while mine seems to have off an' run away me thinks! Hehe, they're always afta me lucky charms!"

The Brock did not know how best to reply to such a strange slurry of speech, other then the following.

"Why most mad Deathlake, do you not speak with the wrong accent, for mine memory believes your disease riddled countenance to be rather of Canadian descent , not irish."

He did take one long deep breath before continuing.

"Why dost thou follow the sirens call that surely lead to both thine and mine meeting a swift premature demise at the hands of our captors? would it not be best to turn tail and run back from whence we came, for we are both woefully unarmed! I should like to crack open the skulls of whoever doth dare kidnap me as much as thou does, but thine powers mutagenic are but the swift healing of thy body, nothing that might lead to our escape!"

The Pool of the Dead and Brock did arrive at a door, and the bemasked madman did push it open and step though, and hark! the narration turned back to normal with a loud bang! as Deadpool's scrambled brain finally recovered.  
>"Yo Eddie, was everything just all biblical for you? cause if not that was some weird ass shit I was hallucinating."<br>"I have no *&$%*)^ idea what you're talking about, just shut up and put your goddamn pants back on!" Eddie shouted and shoved a pair of red and black tights in Deadpool's face.  
>He quickly stepped into them with a squeal of glee.<p>

"Pants! you do always come back! or was that boomerangs? Whatever, all the same to me!"

The room was barren and gray aside from the brown wooden table and chairs, a tv screen mounted to the back wall.

The Blank screen switched on and a man whose face was obscured by shadows appeared.  
>He spoke suddenly and with no warning.<br>"Gentlemen, this is a prerecorded message, should you be witnessing it you have freed yourselves from the virtual reality chairs and are no doubt wonder what is going on. I do apologize for that but it was the only way to make sure you two could be... trusted."

Deadpool liked this turn of events, so far it made a lot more sense, the whole stealing Ironman's suit to kill but then teaming up instead with Venom to take down the Kingpin who turned out to be Carnage thing was so confusing it was like whoever wrote it just didn't care.  
>But his train of thought was stopped by the strange man's continued exposition.<p>

"Our great nation has been invaded! an unknown amount of shapeshifting aliens have infiltrated the US government, we do not know how deep this goes, but that's for you to decide."

Deadpool jumped up and exclaimed "Why should I care? I'm canadian! call me when Canada gets invaded by Skrulls or whatever Skrull knockoff we're dealing with now."

The tape flickered and continued. "You may be wondering why we think you'll work for us, and the answer is really quite simple. Mr. Brock, agree to our terms and we will truly reunite you with your... suit. And Mr. Wilson, you are a mercenary yes? we will pay you for this job."

The two unlikely heroes sat in the badly lit room quietly for what seemed like forever, when the voice from the video spoke up from behind them.

"Well then, do we have a deal or not?" he said as he strode into the room with a suitcase and a cylindrical container filled with something black.

Eddie Look like he was struggling with the thoughts in his head, trying to say no.  
>But he didn't, because This <em>was <em>what he wanted as much as he hated to admit it, he was addicted to being venom, his life was just empty without the suit.

"I-I'm in." he suddenly said, grabbing the container from the man with shaking hands.

"Alll righty roo! where do we start eh?" asked an excited deadpool after seeing how much money was in the case and being told that was only "half" of his pay for the job.


	8. Chapter 7

**Author's Commentary**

Marvel Killed off Eddie Brock, Everyone is mad about Spider-Man's "death" but that isn't ever going to stick guys, Eddie Brock also died around the same time but he's not important enough to be revived anytime soon so I'm more annoyed about that.

People think the alien suit is what makes venom, but personally feel that the character doesn't work without Eddie; which was why i had started this fanfic before it got crazy and deadpool-y.

* * *

><p>"WOOSH!" shouted Deadpool as they arrived at the meeting place of their inside contact, Venom unaware of the scene changes as 'Pool was, the alien and the former reporter just shook their heads at what they thought was Wade being a moron as normal.<p>

Deadpool missed his thought boxes, there was such a lack of them in fanfic, and _italics just don't do it for me like little yellow boxes, no sir! At least we've made it seven whole chapters before any mary sues or shipping shows up, I'm not going to fall for Venom no matter what you want fangirls!- _

Venom slapped him on the back of the head, pointing down the alley.

"They're here, pay attention and ssshut up."

The contact was a young woman with retarded rainbow hair and two different colored eyes, how original. She introduced herself as Lucy Black, a Mutant with super strength speed and healing, "among others things" as she had said.

Deadpool leaned over to eddie and whispered into his ear.

"Yo brock, I got a bad feeling about this chick, just get the info and let's leave."

"Nonsense!" Eddie shouted as he shoved deadpool over and into a pile of trash bags."There is nothing wrong with her at all, in fact she's quite delightful!"

Deadpool looked at lucy and back to Venom, repeating this several times before starting to sob.

"She got to him already, damn mary sues! 30 seconds with him and she's made him fall

for her and start acting out of character!"

"Say lucy, we could really use your help in this fight, we can't do this without you." eddie said to the girl, who hugged him and yelled out "Why of course my darling! I'll help you and your little friend!"

"That's it! Time to go kick some alien ass!" Shouted an enraged 'Pool, triggering a scene shift. When they arrived at the next scene Venom acted as nothing happened but The OC Chick held her and head and fell over, prompting Venom to run to her side.

"Baby are you alright? what happened my love?" he said.

Deadpool groaned, he did not like where this was going at all, and what the hell? "My love? You JUST MET HER DUDE, maybe take her out on a date before you decide to love her." deadpool said, then shifting his focus to the dizzy woman. "And you! Bad mary sue, bad! Fourth wall breaking is _my _thing!"

Deadpool pulled out a glock and unloaded it into that annoying woman, Venom shouting "NOOOOO!" like Darth Vader in that crappy blu-ray of Return of the Jedi.

He blew the smoke off his gun's barrel and let out a sigh of relief. ""Glad that's over with, eh eddie?"

"You. MURDERER!" Eddie shouted as Venom's black skin took over and a giant arm grabbed Deadpool by the throat.

"Oh come on Eddie, she was controlling your mind! can't you se-GACK!"

Venom shook and shook Deadpool, squeezing the life out of him. His mind a white hot wall of rage, all he wanted was to kill deadpool, kill him for killing... uh?

why did he care so much about this girl? He dropped Deadpool, grabbed head own head and screamed, a sharp pain in his mind broke through the wall of rage and after it passed he thought so much more clearly, looking back at the dead woman named Lucy.

"&*%$#^, she really did get to me huh? why weren't you affected Wade." He asked, puzzled by the whole thing.

"Oh well you know, can't mind control someone who's batshit insane, know what I'm sayin?" 'Pool replied. "I can't be mind read either by the way, comes in handy it does, you have no idea."

Finally getting a good look at their surroundings, Deadpool gasped, it was the %^&*$%# White House!

"Woah woah woah! Slow the %&(# down, I think we missed something important here! Damn that Mary Sue, making us miss plot points!"

Suddenly deadpool sensed lazy writing and was thrown into a flashback.

"_Ooh, italics!"_

_They were back in the meeting with the badly integrated OC, she was explaining what was going on._

"_Okay you two, listen up cause I ain't tellin ya twice, we're gonna go find out how deeply infested the US government is with these aliens, and the easiest way I see to do that is to..."_

"WADE!" Shouted Venom, who was now kneeling by the dead Lucy. "Quit daydreaming and look at this."

He pointed at the body, which was now a gray blob in a wig. "Looks like they can't maintain their forms after they die, how did you know she was one of them?"

Deadpool, dumbstruck; babbled out a reply that seemed more coherent in his head.

"Well You see back in the first arc of Cable and Deadpool I got my molecules are somthin all mixed up with our 90s antihero from the future and ever since then I have minor powers of mindreading and shit you know that's pretty normal right buddy I ju-"

"Wade, shut up!" His companion requested; _forcefully_, Grabbing 'Pool and shaking him until he stopped talking.

They both backed off of each other and stared at the whitehouse, something seemed oddly sinister about it to Wade, of course he's never been on good terms with and figures of authority.

If there were any crickets around they would be chirping in the two silent antihero/former villains.

"Wade..." Eddie broke the silence, his suit peeled back so his face was visible. "I think we're in trouble."

The sound of a very large force of people running towards them from all sides caught deadpool's attention.

Humanoid figures with gray skin and no faces surrounded them; they had weird armor and guns that looked like a cheesy old sci-fi film pointed at our heroes.

"Well, I know what's happening next chapter!" hollored deadpool at the top of his lungs as he pulled out two handguns from their holsters. "Bring it on!"


	9. Chapter 8

The aliens and the heroes stared each other down, it seemed as if this standstill lasted nearly an entire year. Nobody moved; the aliens knowing just how deadly their two opponents were, and 'Pool and Venom were very clearly and decidedly outnumbered, but the story must continue!

"I sure hope you haven't written us into a corner here boss!" shouted an irate Deadpool, "I'm not a fan of Deus Ex Machina, unless it's an actual God coming out of a machine, that would be SWEET!"

Tired of what felt like an endless wave of Deadpool's insanity, Eddie Brook sprang into action, breaking the long calm before the storm.

Venom's suit rippled as it extended various tentacles from it's arms and back; Ignoring deadpool's comment of "I've seen enough hentai to know where this is going" he charged into the aliens, his massive frame taking several shots from the alien guns; he shrugged them off and whipped his tentacles at the aliens like, well… a whip.

The whip tendrils lashed into the aliens bodies, tearing through their armor and drawing purple blood; that's how you knew they were really aliens. Three of them pulled out laser swords that looked exactly how you would expect and ran in swinging in an extremely awkward and uncool way. Venom lept back bringing his tendrils into an uppercut swing, the alien footsoldiers were struck in the face, body, legs, arms, and pretty much everywhere else.

The exploded into chunks of alien and purple blood and venom suit, since their swords managed to get a few tentacles. It didn't slow eddie down, he ran into another force of aliens, punching one so hard their torso went flying into a nearby wall; just the torso; the limbs and other parts stayed behind as if defying the laws of physics.

The whitehouse grounds were filled with the bright flashes of alien gunfire and deadpool's handgun's, as hordes of the extraterrestrials swarmed around our mad sometimes hero, who was proforming a sequence of really cool but unnecessary flips and cartwheels to dodge the aliens oddly slow moving lasers as he fired arcs of bullets into their heads.

"Oh yeah, I'm so *&%^&ing cool!" Pool screamed as he kicked an alien in what he was guessing was it's balls and watched it fall to the grass howling in pain. _not so different are you scum, no sir, nutshots always work! _

His guns clicked with the sound of empty magazines, cursing he tossed them aside, right into the face of an oncoming alien with two guns in both hands.

that's right, this alien was quadruple wielding, what a showoff!

Deadpool was sent flying by a barrage of shots from the 4 gun holding alien, his suit and body ripped to shreds by advanced technology.

_Cut back to venom already this isn't as good time to focus on me, it's embarrassing!_

In a field of death and carnage; thankfully not _that _Carnage, venom stood brawling with a 9 foot tall brute of an alien in some sort of power suit. he ducked below a robotically enhanced swing that could have taken even his head off and followed up with an uppercut, sending the powersuit alien into the air, only to have it change course and crash back into him with a flying dropkick.

He grunted in both anger and pain as he hit the ground with a crack, hopefully that crack was the ground breaking and not his ribs, but further assessment of his pain would say otherwise.

The brute was coming for him, he had to do something fast, drawing on the suits memories of it's time with Spider-Man as it's host, he created webbing out of the suit material, he didn't know how it could do this and frankly he didn't care, quickly using the webbing to create a net.

He threw the net over the strong but rather stupid brute, snaring him and sealing his movements. He grasped the brutes head with one hand and it's body with the other, quickly making the two wholly separate existences.

"How many aliensss are there in thiss one place?!" he panted, out of breath from the fight.

Over half the aliens lay dead, seeing this the others began to scatter, Venom managing to take out a few more as they ran, before walking over to Deadpool, who was slowly pulling himself back together after his failure against the 4 gunned alien; one of the few who got away.

"Dammit, This was the one of the biggest fight scenes in the fic and I blew it!" sighed Deadpool as he picked up his left foot and reattached it to his body. "How'd you do buddy?"

"Ssstill ssstanding, can't assk for more." Replied Venom, "Let usss finish the job and be done with it."

"I'm sorry brock, I'm afraid I can't like you do that..." came a new voice, if there was a camera it would have slowly panned around dramatically to show off this new character, but this is a fanfic so that didn't happen.

Standing aways away from them was an alien in a suit, not a mech suit or a supervillain suit; A normal, human suit.

he also had hand that turned into horrible claw things about 2 feet long, glowing red eyes and a baseball cap with the logo of the most evil company of all time, EA Games.

"Oh &(5*!" yelped Deadpool. "It was YOU that ruined the ultima games wasn't it!"

"What?" asked the alien, but it was too late because the chapter suddenly ended.

Tune in next time if you're somehow reading this on a tv from the 40s that required tuning.


	10. Chapter 9 - Final

Greetings mortals, I am the all powerful Lord of Rahkshi here to lay some smackdown on Marvel being weird as hell recently.

Both eddie brock and spider-man are alive again, great, but why in Ahura Mazda's name is Eddie now TOXIN, with Toxin's original host having died OFF PANEL.

What are you doing Marvel.

* * *

><p>The Alien, the CEO of EA game's Alpha Centarui branch; charged in. he slashed horizontally across deadpool's body, nearly slicing him clean in half as his suit was sprayed with blood.<p>

Venom slashed at the alien, who ducked under it and kicked out Eddie's legs.

Soon the alien was on top of Eddie Brock/ Venom in a decidedly not homoerotic way no matter how you look at it, seriously guys.

Fist after alien fist smashed Venom in the face, his suit unable to hold it's form any longer; falling to the ground and exposing eddie brock's face, which also began to be pummeled.

Brock kneed the alien in what looked like it's groin, a move he had learned from Deadpool last chapter.

The CEo howled and feel to the side of Brock, who hopped up and kicked him in the ribs, sending him flying at least 30 feet. The alien CEO recovered in mid air, twisting his body unnaturally and landed on his feet.

During all this Deadpool hadn't been sitting idly by, his regenerative healing factor had kicked in and reattached his torso, he had then snuck up on the alien final boss.

"Hey &^^&*, eat this!" he shouted while clicking a button on his belt. "bet nobody was expecting this!"

A wave of energy from his belt buckle enveloped the area and the mad assassin cackled "this is for you Araki, Za Warudo!"

Time stopped, for everybody but 'Pool, he pulled a handful of knives out of somewhere you don't want to know about and threw them at the alien despite how little being able the throw things while time is stopped makes, in a blatant ripoff of something from some weird japanese series used completely legally as fair use parody here please don't sue me!

The very short time stopping belt power ran out of charge after about 5 seconds and Deadppol shouted "Checkmate ea, this is for Dungeon Keeper mobile!"

The alien tried to dodge the knives but he couldn't react in time and was skewered, falling to the ground while gasping his last words.

"Master, the plan to *please pay 99 cents to listen to the rest of his dying confession*"

"God%$*^ microtransactions, you got any money on you venom, I'm broke." asked deadpool as he strolled through the carnage of the last chapters battle and reached out to the fallen venom.

Eddie took deadpool hand is a totally platonic way with no implied yaoi slash and stood up, his weak symbiote barely able to cover his rippling muscles, because things weren't gay enough right now according to my marketing agent.

"Wade, I have no idea what you're talking about, let's just save the president and get out of here already." growled Eddie.

They slowly made their way to the Whitehouse, Eddie shaking his head at Deadpool's complaints that he didn't see any Steamrollers, until the made it to the front doors.

Eddie, Venom suit recovered slightly, bashed it in sending splinters of wooden door frame everywhere.

Inside the door they saw something totally unexpected, an alien lair. On second thought this was exactly what they expected since they've been fighting aliens for a while now.

"Dammit writer, why wasn't that guy the final boss, you even said he was!" Deadpool cried to the heavens, but he received no answer.

At the heart of the whitehouse they found a pod, inside the pod was president ******, who they freed, ending the story as the climax already happened.

"What kind of lame ending is this?!" Hollered Deadpool, who seemed furious.

But this story never does what you expect it to (hopefully!) so there is no better ending then an abrupt one, for there's only so much you can do with this idea.

* * *

><p>So yeah, game over, I really don't know how to end this and I started this due to writer's block, it's amazing it made it this long honestly.<p>

I might come back and do another story about this ill fitting team but I don't know when if ever, sorry for disappointing last chapter I really have no more ideas right now.


End file.
